You should be frustrated, actually...

You should be very frustrated

But then do something about it. Frustration is an awesome feeling, that you should experience so you can shift into high gear. But do not make it a habit to tolerate frustration because you will settle and accept mediocrity. But how do we channel that frustration as leaders?

What’s causing frustration?

Great question. Think about your personal life for some guidance. What is frustrating you at this moment? Is it your career because you want a different role, or more money, or you feel stuck? It is the bills because you never seem to break through the cycle of credit card debt and endless expenses that you can never get ahead of? Is it a relationship that is not giving you everything you need out of it? Maybe it’s your health and eating habits, and you don’t like the number you see on the scale, and losing the extra inches seems to be a hopeless endeavor.

Frustration is caused by our desire for something better, in an area that we have control over. In essence, you’re usually frustrated because it is something you can change, but something is holding you back.

Let’s clear one thing up. I’m not referring to the fleeting frustration you might have with your phone because it decides to act up at the worst time possible. Or your work laptop because your company’s network is designed to be slow as molasses.

I’m referring to bigger frustrations that simmer deep down inside of you for the big reasons in your life as a person, and as a leader.

You never get frustrated by gravity because it’s a fact of life and unchangeable, and you have no control over it.

But you definitely get frustrated when your team continues to do the opposite of what you asked them to do. Or not follow your instructions accurately, leading to sub-par results that you warned them about.

Frustration leads to innovation and action

We’ve all heard about Gretha Thunburg lately. A 17-year old, who passionately shared her frustration with the wider world on the importance of urgently addressing climate change, which sparked world-wide activism that will undoubtedly lead to positive results.

How to channel frustration?

1. Is it because of you or because of someone else?

If you’re frustrating yourself, you need to have a good talk with yourself. Ask yourself why you’re feeling that way, and what are you going to do about it.

There are multiple reasons for your frustration. I’m by no means great at playing the guitar, but I enjoy picking one up and relaxing while playing some music. Now, learning to play the guitar was extremely frustrating because I wanted the results to be immediate, but the skill takes many hours of practice to get anything close to decent.

In this example, lack of skill causes frustration. But if I lack the desire to put in the effort and still want the results, I’ll frustrate myself even further.

2. Are you willing to put in the effort and do something about it?

That’s really the foundation of this whole frustration ordeal. Frustration is such a basic ingredient of life, like anger and happiness, and it is very natural to experience. But because it is very personal and a deep emotional state, only you have the power to harness it.

So, what are you going to do about it? This is where you have to be honest with yourself and commit to taking action. You can either keep complaining about the problem, or do something about it in a positive manner.

Excuses are the enemy of overcoming frustration.

3. Is it someone else?

Then you need to talk to them. As a leader, you need to sit down and address your expectations with the team member or group that is not achieving the results you outlined.

Frustrated leaders have themselves to blame for staying frustrated, because as a leader you have all the tools and resources to make the change.

If someone is not performing at a high level you have the ability to coach them, develop them, or replace them.

Many leaders struggle to hold their team members accountable in a timely and transparent manner. That leads to built up frustration on the leader’s part until one day they’ve had enough, and they put together the most substantial corrective action known to man with every crime possible that the associate committed in recorded history. That is a terrible way to address frustration.

If a problem exists because it is very complicated, you have the authority to involve other peers and resources to tackle the solution together.

There are many parts to this topic, but the bottom line is this: do something with that frustration today.